no doubt, we have all received or at the very least seen the wide variety of promotional products that companies use to bombard you with their name and logo. drug companies are excellent at this. anyone that knows a nurse or anyone that works at a hospital knows about some of stuff drug companies hand out to entice doctors to prescribe their drugs to patients (pens, candy jars, stethoscopes, blood pressure cuffs, instrument trays, etc.).
what you might not have seen is the weird shit that companies make for other companies to put their logos on and give away to clients and potential customers. so here’s my list of weird-ass promotional products that i have found:
plungers
caution: not intended as a promo for nyc cops
yes you read that right, plungers. apparently the company that is selling these promo plungers calls these “an incredible promotional item for the money.” i don’t know about you, but when i clog my toilet after a night of eating greasy burritos and grab my trusty promo plunger to unclog a stinky ass bomb from the toilet, i immediately want to buy all of the products that that company sells. ca-ching!
custom printed condoms
this company offers an assortment of condoms that can be handed out for promotional purposes. some of the stash that you can supply includes condom pops (seriously, a condom lollipop), condom keychains, matchbook condoms (designed to look like a matchbook but is really just a discrete condom package), custom bulk condoms. not only do they offer condoms (you can have your logo printed on the foil too!) but they also offer lube.
this company also claims that companies as diverse as financial firms, law firms, restaurants, beverage makers, bicycle shops, and even airlines hand out these babies. and as they say, “nothing is as much fun as a condom pop. go for it!”
custom emergency roadside kits
from the same company that brought you the promo plunger, comes the custom emergency roadside kit promo. not only do they offer custom emergency roadside kits, but they have a wide variety to choose from, all with the ability to get your name and logo on them as well of course. some are very simple with just enough shit to make sure that you don’t get hit on the side of the road while changing your tire (such as flares and reflectors) to as fancy as including a fire extinguisher, tire inflator/sealer, booster cables, safety vest, 2 D batteries, pliers, phillips screwdriver, regular screwdriver, distress help flag, 8 piece first aid kit, flashlight, cone, 6 clean naps, blah, blah, blah.
this kit would only make sense for aaa or a kragen.
seeds
and not the good kind that can get you high once they’ve grown. just plain. old. boring. seeds. yawn. the only thing redeemable about this promo product is that this company gets pretty creative about how they package the seeds. if you check out the site, you can see that they have packets that look like money, shaped like dollar signs, and even a business card that contains seeds. the sad thing is that no matter how you package it, it’s still just seeds.
usb drives
ok. so this may be not so weird or anything but just hold on for a second, ok? bastard. anyways. everyone can use a usb drive. they come in handy. you can store some back up info on them, take documents from computer easily if they’re too big to e-mail, or whatever. since they are so handy, there are some pretty unusual (and i mean fucking weird) usb drives out there that are being handed out.
golden usb drives
yeah, and not just the color. they’re made out of real gold. don’t believe me? well, fuck off. google it. they’re about as cheap as $1328 and go to well over $3000. i can only imagine that the type of people who use these are the same ones that fucked up our economy, douche bag wall street types.
usb drive people
no, not real people but bit-sized toy people. you can choose any color of nerd that you like to hand out to your customers. there’s some cross over here, there’s even one that looks like it’s made out of gold, or perhaps like c-3po. but it doesn’t end there. oh no. they have usb toys as well. cars and shit. crazy
promotional pepper spray pen
i’m not really sure to say about this one, but it is kinda cool. it’s just like it sounds. pepper spray that looks like a normal pen. i guess it’s for those annoying coworkers that just can’t get the hint to shut the fuck up. well, after a little douse from this baby there won’t be anymore annoyances, except perhaps unemployment and a pesky lawsuit. the bad thing is that i can’t find out if it can write or if the pen part is just for looks.
if you have any other weird-ass promotional products, let us know.
